Pointless Insanity
by Angelstar1158
Summary: Rate for language and pointlessness. It's just a regular day in Quatre's mansion. Mix in the authoress and you get a frying pan on the head! R&R!


Hey! I know I said that I wouldn't write anymore but this insane idea came to me while I was reading some of the great fanfics out there. Especially that one where it has _someone_ dancing chibi style singing, "Na na na na na na na, I'm the queen of your base!" So cute!

Anyways, on with my fic of pointlessness and insanity.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Gundam Wing, dammit! If I did, I'd be filthy rich and I'll pair Wufei up with my own character! And I'd have Heero kill off Relena in the English version!

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**_'Slap!'_**

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**_'SLAP!'_**

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These two noises rang throughout the entire mansion owned by Quatre Raberba Winner. A certain blur of chestnut and a rope of hair could be seen running at top speed out of the kitchen and hot on his heels, an Asian girl wielding a deadly frying pan.

"DUO MAXWELL! I AM GOING TO KICK YOUR ASS SKY HIGH, YOU STUPID PERVERT!"

_Duo snuck into the kitchen with cat-like grace, about to pounce on his unsuspecting prey. Her ebony hair was in a loose ponytail and she was quietly humming a random song while bustling around the kitchen, making tea for the Gundam Boys. _

_The pilot of Deathscythe moved in and a wide grin spread across his handsome features. Slowly, quietly, he moved closer and closer._

_The girl's paranoia kicked in and stiffened upon feeling a presence behind her. She slowly turned around but at that moment. _

_SLAP!_

_Pilot 02 took the opportunity to slap her ass. He laughed wildly at the expression of sheer horror and surprise on her 14-year-old face. Her lips twisted into a scowl and her hand came down hard along 02's cheek. _

_SLAP! _

_Now it was Duo's turn to be surprised. But he didn't have too much time to dwell on the stinging pain on his face. The girl grabbed a frying pan from the stove and held it high over her hand. _

_Now Duo's soldier training kicked in and did the only thing he could. Run. And run he did. Ran like a little girl who just came face to face with her worst fears. _

_"DUO MAXWELL! I'M GOING TO KICK YOUR ASS SKY HIGH, YOU STUPID PERVERT!"_

That's how this situation came to be.

Heero and Wufei were currently playing a nice game of chess on the coffee table. Trowa was sitting comfortably, legs crossed, on a sofa and Quatre was sitting on another sofa, changing the strings of his violin. All was peaceful and quiet until Duo decided to run inside and dive onto the sofa that Quatre resided on.

"Duo, what's going on?" asked a very confused Quatre with Duo suddenly behind him.

"Asian girls are very violent chicks, ya know that?" He asked in reply.

Wufei was about to open his mouth and retort, most likely something about women being annoying and weak but the said girl decided to run into the room, still armed with frying pan.

"DUO! WHERE ARE YOU?!" Her dark brown eyes scanned the room and landed on Quatre, behind him was Duo.

"YOU STUPID LITTLE IDIOT! OMAE O KOROSU!" Heero scowled slightly as his trademark line was stolen, "AND STOP HIDING BEHIND QUATRE!"

"Make me!" He stuck his tongue at her childishly.

"Jenny, please relax, I'm sure whatever Duo did, he didn't mean any harm," Said the peacemaker of the group, Quatre.

"Hell no! That's damned pervert slapped my ass!"

This caused Quatre to sweatdrop, Trowa to sigh, Wufei to roll his eyes, Duo to laugh sheepishly and Heero to..........well, nothing.

"Hey! It's not my fault! It was shaking too much in the kitchen! And you wouldn't dare hurt me!" retorted the now grinning Duo.

Jenny rolled her eyes, "And why would that be?"

"Because I'm cute, hot, cool and sexy!" was the reply.

Silence.

Duo looked around, "What? It's true!"

"You give yourself too much credit, Maxwell," said Wufei.

"He's right," Jenny nodded towards the direction of the other Chinese occupant in the room. "Also, Quatre is cuter, Wufei's hotter, Trowa is cooler and Heero's sexier! So don't even try it!"

"No way! That's not true at all!"

"Yeah it is,"

"No it isn't!"

"Yes it is!"

"No!"

"Yes!"

"NO!"

"YES!"

"NO!"

"YES!"

"NO!"

"YES!"

"NO!"

"YES!"

"NO!"

"YES!"

"NO!"

"YES!"

"NO!"

"YES!"

**"WOULD YOU TWO SHUT THE HELL UP?!" **yelled the normally cold, Japanese pilot.

Everything in the room was still and all attention was focused on Heero. His right eye was twitching ever so slightly and if you were very close to him, you'd feel a deadly aura radiating from his very core.

"Good," He sat down on his chair he was previously sitting on.

Jenny sighed, "Goddammit, Heero, don't do that,"

"And don't _you_ start chasing people around with a frying pan," Duo mock-glared at the girl.

Jenny pretended not to hear him, "Tea, I'll go get it," She then waltz out of the room.

"I'm still better looking than all of you guys," Duo muttered.

"I heard that!" Came the voice of the previous menace from the hall and in a cheery tone she added, "Also, I think that Wufei would make a better husband than you, little Maxwell!"

Wufei's cheeks were tinted with pink and he muttered something about stupid women who likes to mess with others. Trowa, Quatre and Heero raised an eyebrow but said nothing.

Duo, on the other hand, fell into a fit of giggles.

"Wufei and Jenny sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-" He didn't get a chance to finish when a frying pan and a fist came down upon our poor Shinigami's head.

"That's should shut you up for a while," Jenny smirked in victory while Wufei fist was still ready to give our favorite braided baka some more.

Wufei was about to walk back to his seat when,

"You know Wufei, I wasn't lying about what I said earlier,"

"WHAT?!"

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Yo! Decided to write another story for the heck of it. It's fun.

Wufei: Why did you say that?

Because………it's fun.

Wufei: You think everything is fun!

Duo: Did you really have to hurt me?

shrugs Would've brought Relena in the fic and bashed her but I'll save that for another time. For now, I had to bash you.

Duo: pouts Meanie.

Kawaii! gives Duo a lollypop Enjoy.

Duo: YAY! unwraps it and pops it into his mouth

Quatre: So, what's going to happen after this? A sequel?

Nope! I suck at writing stories and this proves it! Actually, I can't write a full story without any fillers. points to her other fics Look at what happened to them!

Wufei: Baka onna. mutters something in Mandarin

You know that I hate you right? You speak Mandarin and I speak Cantonese! I can't understand what you're saying!

Wufei: superior smirk That's why women are weak.

And that's why you're stupid! At least I speak more languages that you do! You speak 3, counting the dubbed version which I hate.

Wufei: What about you onna? Don't you just speak 3?

Four. Cantonese, English, French and Japanese. Partial of course for the last two.

Wufei: THAT DOESN'T COUNT!

It does now! Anyway please drop a review while I try to shut Wufei up.

Wufei: YOU DO NOT NEED TO SHUT ME UP!

Be quiet, you're giving me a headache. Anyways, bye bye!

Wufei: Wait! I'm not done! gets whacked with a frying pan

There. And good bye! Until next time!


End file.
